If you want to improve any area of your life the smartest decision you can make is getting a great Coach…
Whether is sports, health, nutrition, business or any area of life the most successful people leverage Coaches to help them reach greater levels
But what type of Coach do you need?
I work with Businessmen and a common theme I see is Businessmen put so much focus on their Business as the vehicle that will provide all their success, love and happiness… Yet a lot of them end up unhappy, unfulfilled, neglecting relationships and their health
I live by the following statement “My Business Growth is a direct reflection of my Personal Growth”
In todays video I share why I believe most Businessmen need a Life Coach more than a Business Coach…
“I Help Businessmen Release Their Past So They Can Create Success, Love and Happiness”
Our very unique Life Coaching program incorporates 2 Coaches , my wife and I… Focusing on your Mind and Body…
Right now, I’m standing at my desk in my home office writing out this post. I’ve just come off a Coaching call with one of my favorite Male clients where he made another personal breakthrough, and earlier today I spent an hour on my Morning Routine along with recording a couple of new video’s for LinkedIn and Facebook.
After I finish this post, I’m going to take a break, have some lunch with my wife, reply to some emails, check in with my team, and then meet with new potential client.
This is a typical day for me and I just love what I do.
I also want other Businessmen to do what they love too.
But before I share my vision for other Businessmen, I want to take you back a few years…
End of 2015, my wife and were packing up our lives to move back to Australia. We had just spent two years living in Singapore – where I was stationed to setup a US company in South-East Asia.
We made the decision to move to an area where we had never lived before and I had big plans to start my own business after 20+ years in Corporate. So I decided to go all in and launch my own Consulting and Digital Marketing Agency
I had all the skills and knowledge to set up the Business as I had done it before for other companies
Although it took a bit of work to set up, it was exciting and fun, and I started getting great clients early on, Yet I was not quite ready for the emotional roller-coaster that was about to follow.
The business and revenue were growing, and so was my stress, worry, fear and anxiety. I started to see how comfortable I had it in Corporate and starting my own business started exposing years of ignoring and suppressing my emotions.
Like most Businessmen I wasn’t good at dealing with negative emotions and feelings so I used Alcohol to numb the pain and find some happiness on those shitty days!
(note: Avoiding, Ignoring and Numbing emotional pain will only bring you more pain and suffering… pain always has a message for us and if we don’t listen to the message it will get stronger.)
Emotionally things went from bad to worse… Anxiety, Stress and Self Sabotage with Alcohol were taking over my life and I didn’t have the comfy Corporate gig to hide behind … I still had to keep building, running and maintaining my new Business to pay the bills and support my wife and 3 kids.
What was wrong with me, I was following my goals and plans yet I was miserable !!!
Then one night I woke up having a huge Panic Attack, this was my breaking point and I finally Surrendered and Admitted I needed help. You see to the outside World I had it all, Money, Investments, Business, Wife, Kids, House, Cars etc yet on the Inside I was broken, felt like a failure and I wasn’t Good Enough.
And so my healing and self discovery journey begun.
You know the saying “You Don’t Know, What You Don’t Know” well this started to become my life, you see I have done years of personal development, books, tapes, programs, seminars etc etc BUT this a whole different kind of development, a deep clearing, reprogramming and spiritual journey… It was and is so profound.
Over the past 3 years I have invested $30k+ specific into myself, including:
Life & Archetypal Coaching,
Neural Pathway Reprogramming, NLP
Soul Alignment and Energy Healing work.
I removed Negative Past programming, beliefs, Influences and Energy blocks in my Mind and Body that were the Cause of my pain, suffering, self worth issues and self sabotage
And I started to Improve every area of my life and developed heightened Energy, Intuition and Inner Guidance
What this enabled me to see, feel and understand was that most people are struggling internally with their own Demons and I now have the skills, tools and desire to help them.
Where I Am Now
Today, I have a different perspective on life, I have pivoted my business to Life & Business Coaching for Men, I have stopped drinking, I have removed Anxiety and Self Sabotage, I am aligned to my higher purpose, my connection with my Wife and Kids is amazing, I’m being a true role model for all the people In my life and I’m healing my Internal body from the years of abuse and punishment I put on it.
But, what is my vision for other Men? And how does this relate to you?
My Vision for other Men
Educate that Self Healing & Self Discovery is essential to evolve
Help thousands of Men release their past and access their Innate potential
Create a Brotherhood of Men being Role Models/Coaches for other Men
To have more Men lead by example for our children and future generations
And this is where I come in: I want to help Men just like you become more enlightened, free from past Influences, programming and beliefs. I want to see Men become greater than they can imagine so they can serve at a level higher than themselves.
The changes that I highlighted above means that Men need to face the fear of the unknown, drop their guard and be open to new ways to evolve to become a better Man.
It’s not easy facing your inner demons and change so I know its not for everyone.
Over to You
What I want to know is this:
Do you want to be more, grow more and be an example of a Man who is constantly evolving?
Do you want to go on a deep Self Healing and Self Discovery journey, to release the past and access an Inner Strength greater than you?
1. I Ignored my Past and only Focusing on my Future
This is No.1 for me personally because when I understood how detrimental my Past programming, beliefs and suppressed emotions was having on my life I was blown away.
As Men we try to ignore any pain, mistakes or traumatic events from our past, we push it down, brush it under the carpet …
Why would we want to rehash that stuff?
Just Focus on the Positives and move forward Right? WRONG!
Ignoring and pushing down our Emotions, feelings, traumatic memories does make them go away… It cements them in our Unconscious Mind and creates an enormous amount of confusion and conflict when our Conscious Mind is thinking or trying to make decisions…
It’s like driving your car around all day with the Hand brake of full and not realising it, your Car’s perform will drop, things will start to break and eventually your Car will Burnout and need some major attention and work done to fix it back up…
So, for me and most of you reading this, we use Will Power to push through. Heck most of the Self-Help gurus say, “Think Positive”, “Push Yourself”, “Build Your Mindset” these are all important, until your Will Power runs out all the following start to flood in:
– Self-Sabotage (Alcohol and Food)
– Feeling Unworthy, I’m Not Good Enough
– Feeling Unsupported, Lonely and Lost
– Feeling Unhappy, Unfulfilled and like there was something wrong
– Feeling Unlovable, Not Loving Yourself
– And all the other self-doubt and negative self-talk that is controlling our minds
I did all that Personal Development, Positive Thinking, Mindset training etc and for the most part I would get short term boost of Motivation, but for the long term I ended up feeling worse, like there was something wrong with me and I wasn’t Not Enough…
Then I hit rock bottom before I surrenders and asked for Help… I don’t the Masks, I was vulnerable, raw and admitted I was struggling
What I learnt was I didn’t need Mindset work, I needed Mind-Reset work and I needed to get the right help to release all the Emotions and Feelings that I had suppressed over the years which effected both my Mind and my Body
If you want to learn exactly what I did to release my past beliefs, programming and suppressed emotions, then please click the link to watch the Video:
This is the hardest lesson I’ve had to come to terms with, as a driven Entrepreneur the Motivation and Visualisation of “Having It All” was so glorified in my head that it become an unhealthy obsession…
My thoughts, self-talk and conversations with my Wife and Kids was always future based:
– Everything will be amazing when …….
– We will be able to do ‘xyz’ when …….
– I can’t wait until we have ……
– Imagine life when we are ……
The reality was!
I was never happy, never fulfilled, I was not giving myself, my wife or my children the quality time that we all truly desired and needed.
I’m sure you can relate as its so easy to get caught up in the Matrix of life, with all the Noise, Demands and Pressure we have and put on ourselves.
Not only was I not living in the ‘Now’. I was giving away my Power, Happiness and Life to a future materialistic reward called Money.
Combine that with my self-worth issues outlined in item 1; then I could only look at things External to myself to creating Happiness… This never ends well!
I have spoken to a lot of Businessmen who have given themselves to their Business, to create Wealth so they provide a better life for themselves and their Family … and in doing so the unspeakable happens, there Marriage falls apart, there Health deteriorates and they end up in massive place of Confusion and Overwhelm, saying “how the hell did I get here”? … “This is not the life I planned”!
I’ve learnt through my own Self-Healing and Self-Discovery journey that when we are ignoring or not listening to our Internal Wisdom (Intuition) we become very disconnecting from ourselves.
When we are disconnected from ourselves and our own truth, we start placing all our focus on External things/people as a source of Happiness!
This could be Money, Toys or even our loved ones….
I’ve made it 100% my responsibility to create my own internal Happiness through self-love, self-discovery, self-healing and then I bring my Happiness to all my relationships and businesses … In doing so I don’t need to focus on Money as it come to me more easily …
Of course, I could not have done this on my own, I Invested in myself and got a lot of help. To learn more about what I did to transform my Life click the link below:
3. My Work Hard, Play Hard attitude was Slowly Killing me!
Whether it was Business, Sales, Socialising, Sport or Exercise I pushed myself hard… I truly believed that was the key to winning and being successful. Little did I know the stress and pressure I was putting on my Mind and Body.
Here are some examples:
I have been in Online Marketing for 12 years as I write this post and Lord knows this Industry has and is evolving rapidly… The up and coming Entrepreneurs are pushing the envelope, hacking and recreating everything … to keep up with it all will have you burning the candle at both ends ….
Well you guessed it … I tried to keep up for years… Some people call it ‘Shiny Object Syndrome’ or ‘FOMO’ (Fear of Missing Out), yes there was an alignment of that, however I was genuinely interested in learning everything I read or purchased… that 15 hour days were normal, on my mobile while having dinner with Family was normal (This is still a bad habit I’m working on 😊 )
What I have learnt was this:
– I was doing it out of Fear
– I was constantly comparing myself to others
– I was killing my Mental Health and effecting Quality Sleep
– I was constantly disconnected from myself and immersed by digital Influence
– I was un-Focus, even though I thought the opposite
– I was missing out on Life
Trouble is I’m in a few Global Online marketing Facebook Groups and the above has been normalised, a badge of honour who works late nights and weekends… Ultimately these people are burning themselves out, increasing their stress levels and getting anxiety and overwhelm from doing exactly what I use to do …
My biggest change here was giving myself permission to do nothing, sit in the sun, read a book… Remove myself from work and digital distractions…. STOP Punishing my Mind!
In my teens and twenties, I played a lot of Rugby, so growing up I was always exercising, keeping fit and weight training to build conditioning. Back then the Culture was Play Hard then Drink Hard … very punishing on the body … we all thought we were bullet proof back then.
When I stopped playing competitive sports, I continued with a regular training routine and the regular Drinking.
Over the years obviously my life got busier, more responsibilities, career, business, family etc So I didn’t have the same available time to train as I use to.
The problem for me is my Drinking continued, got worse actually and on top of all the other pressures of life, when I did go and exercise, I would punish myself for drinking, eating bad food and try and play catch up for all the missed training sessions.
This was detrimental on my Body as I would damage myself, hurt my lower back etc … you would think I would learn and take it easy, but no! I joined a CrossFit gym and I would punish myself at speed.
Why did I do this? It all comes back to item 1:
I had self-worth issues, and I allowed my Egoic Mind to control my life. I didn’t listen to my Body and learn what it needed to have support and regenerate. Then I was pushing myself to Exhaustion almost burnout and I was constantly in Survival Stress.
As I went through my Healing journey, I found out why I was doing this to myself and released a lot of beliefs and emotions attached to self-worth that were showing up as constant pushing and punishment.
I introduced several things like Yin Yoga for my lower back pain and going walking.
I also have the privilege of my gifted Wife Tracey who uses a combination of modalities including Advanced Kinesiology and Energy Healing techniques to release the stress, blockages in my body and increase my Energetic Vitality of all my major Organs and Glands… She does this by accessing your Innate Intelligence to identify what support your body needs … these processes dramatically increase the Bodies natural healing capabilities and brought my body and mind into alignment and flow.
To learn more about what Tracey can do, please click the Training Video Link here:
Lastly, but by no means least, the best thing anyone can do for themselves right away is create your own Morning Routine, the first 30 – 60mins of each day, make it about YOU, not your Phone, not work, not Family … YOU.
Here is my High-Level Morning Routine:
– Leaving my Phone alone (Don’t do it, it’s a trap)
– Journal any pressing thoughts (Tasks, Things to do, Negative thoughts and 3 things your most Grateful for)
– Hydration cocktail (You must Hydrate well every morning)
– Grounding/Earthing (Go outside, bare feet on the grass, face the sun, and breath deep x 20)
– Tai Chi movements (Get your energy flowing, check out ‘YOQI’ on Youtube)
– Mindful Practice (Sitting still or Guided Meditation)
– Go for a walk (Without headphones, take in Nature)
– Cold Water Shower (Learn the benefits of cold exposure … Google “Wim Hof”)
– Green Smoothie (Fuel Your body)
If you valued the lessons and information in this post , then please like, share and comment below … I look forward to writing for you again soon…
Below you are about to read a detailed breakdown of 9 Keys Points to becoming a world class Solution Sales Consultant in the Technology Age
Point 1: ALWAYS BE CLOSING
Don’t worry this is not an old school pitch from Glengarry Glen Ross… Doing the hard core close…
The new Art of Selling you should be always closing just in a different context.
You’re helping people go from their current state to their desired state
You should always be “Advancing” the sale, offering enough value at every stage of the process to advance to the next steps.
So, don’t always be closing for the final deal. Always be closing in on the next commitment.
You should be Other Oriented vs. Self-Oriented … when you switch from being “self-oriented” to “other-oriented”, people will immediately respond to you and want you on their team
You will sell faster if you go slower… Wait What? You may be asking, this means you can only go as fast as the prospective client is willing to go, so slow down and be Other Oriented.
Always be in service of people, that’s right Sales is not doing sometime to someone, its doing something for someone
Point 2: ARE YOU TRADING ENOUGH VALUE
Typically, the hardest stage of a sales process is getting the first meeting, if you go straight out and ask the prospective client for a meeting you are being self-oriented and its more about you than them
So, when asking for someone’s value (e.g. their time), always make sure that you’re giving back something that is more valuable.
Its your responsibility to explain the value you’ll provide, never assume they see value
Example of what NOT to say: Hi I’m …….. from ….…. and we help …….. do …….. , can I have 30 mins of your time.
Example of what YOU could say: Listen if you give me 30 mins of your time, I’m going to share with you 3 big ideas that could dramatically change the decision you make in your business over the next 18-24 months and I’ll happily share these with you regardless of whether we do business
Your job is to trade value at every single step. Please note; you must have the value you offered when you show up to the meeting
Think about sales as a hiring process, you are essentially asking someone to make you a part of their team.
When you offer so much value the other party feels compelled to make you a part of their team.
Point 3: HOW TO GET A COMMITMENT OF TIME
No matter what size, company or deal you are chasing the first step is always trying to get a commitment of someone’s time
Always be mindful that someone’s time is their most valuable resource, once they give it they can’t get it back
Do your research and find out everything you can about this person and/or company, you need to find what value they need before you can offer it in exchange for their time
When exchanging your value for their time always specific a time limit (e.g. 20 mins is perfect), this way your likelihood of being granted that 20 mins is higher because the value you bring is greater than the 20 mins
If you want to add value then be personable and use the phone to connect, always leave a voicemail with your value you want to share with them
The power of using the “Phone” to connect with prospects allows you to address any concerns that a person may have, to many sales people hide behind technology and wonder why they aren’t successful
Point 4: CONCERNS ARE NOT OBJECTIONS
The old school training and methods to handle objections was about control and (feel, felt, found), this doesn’t work, and you will only frustrate your prospect, here is what a concern really is and how to handle it.
Change your Mindset about objections!! You are not trying to overcome objections, this is not a time to be dominant
Your job is to help people through change, so when they fire you an objection (e.g. time, money etc) they are saying they are not ready for change
When they are not ready for change, often there is a strong correlation that you have not offered enough value
Do Not wrestle someone into change, your job is to explore the real concerns and the meaning behind them
If you want to get a sale and build a relationship you don’t overcome someone’s objections and help resolve their concerns (Big Difference)
Point 5: CONTROL THE PROCESS
This title may sound contradictory to what we outlined in point 4, however it talks specifically to providing enough value to Advance to the next steps … This is where you want to control the process.
You must follow a sales process that increases your chances of getting a positive decision. Don’t allow the client to skip steps. When you lose control of the process, you’ll most likely lose the sale
There are 2 key stages of a solution selling process. Collaboration and Consensus, when either of these are skipped over or you are left of either of them you’ll risk losing the deal
Never assume the deal is ready to close just because your contacts are giving all the right signals… Always find out if there are other stakeholders who this will affect
Gain a commitment of collaboration from every stakeholder regardless of how small their input
Controlling the process so that you can work together with your client to make sure your proposal meets their needs
Go through your proposal and offer in person and in detail, make sure there is nothing in there that doesn’t have consensus on. If there are any concerns, then address them individually before moving on
Control the proposal walk though to reinforce the value of every step, don’t let the client skip to the price, always explain why you serve your client better than others, don’t allow price to be the deal breaker
Point 6: BUILDING RELATIONSHIPS
In business relationships, there is an economic component but there is also a relationship component. Don’t underestimate the relationship component
Building a relationship with the client will defiantly tilt the direction in your favour
Being consultative, having a personal presence and deep interest in helping your client will be a huge differentiator in your outcomes
By knowing your prospective customer, knowing their business, industry and trends and truly caring about their concerns and success you will invited to provide more opinions as a trusted relationship
Trust is built on one thing which is caring, customise your approach and product so that it fits the clients’ needs. If they feel like you are just trying to get the transaction, then all trust has gone out the window
Be proactive in finding solutions to client’s problems before the problem even arises
Hold yourself accountable to what you are selling, if you are not reliable all the good relationship building will be diminished.
Be a Consultative Sales Person, Be a Trusted Advisor, BE INVALUABLE
Point 7: THE COMMITMENT OF CONSENSUS
With the new way companies operate nowadays and the breaking down of Silos there can be between 6 and 10 people involved in key decision-making processes … Company size is obviously a factor, but regardless it’s a multi division touch on most key decisions
Leaders now realise that to making decisions that drive huge change and impact they need all the key stakeholders onboard
Make sure you know who all the decision makers are regardless of how big or small their involvement
Even if one senior member says they make the final decision, this is a concern that you need to address. Remember to control the process and ask the right questions to softly engage with other stakeholders… something like this Hi ……. In my experience if we don’t bring in your I.T and Finance teams now, ultimately, we will get so far ahead of them that when we are done they will start resisting it and unravel all your good work…
Involving people in the process creates a sense of ownership, if you leave this to long you will get blocked
Remember that everyone doesn’t have to agree, but always make sure that those who don’t agree understand that you have the company’s best interested in mind.
Point 8: THE COMMITMENT OF DECISION
If you have followed all the learnings so far, from providing huge amounts of value, controlling the whole sales process and building solid trust and relationships …. Then getting the decision should be the easy part …
If you didn’t address all their concerns, you are now ahead of the buyer and they will stall
If your prospect is not ready to commit it means that you have not prepared them properly to commit
Before you arrive at this stage, make sure you have given your prospect all the information they need so that it will be easy for them to say YES
Don’t dredge up old concerns that have been addressed, this is asking your client to think of new concerns and become less confident in doing business with you
Stop calling the decision process the “close”. It’s not the close it’s the beginning of the next step and a key advancement to now start the fulfillment process
When asking for the decision, don’t overcomplicate your language. Use language that is straightforward and natural.
Don’t ever pressure anyone into moving forward. Putting pressure on potential clients makes them feel like they are being taken advantage of
Point 9: YOU ARE YOUR PRODUCT
Once you have helped the client make the decision to buy is when the process starts again, this time its executing and fulfilling on your commitments
Depending on what you sell there are multiple levels of value
Product sales – Minimal after sales value (e.g. Coffee)
Experience Sales – Some after sales value, during the experience (e.g. Flight)
B2B Sales – Tangible after sales value, Result driven (e.g. Adwords)
Strategic Sales – Huge after sales value, the problem solver
If you prove yourself to be a problem solver, you’re selling something much more important (and valuable) than your product
Relationships will fall apart if you stop creating value for your clients
Always be looking for greater ways to add value to your relationships/clients
If you stop moving your client forward is when you will be disintermediated by someone who is willing to put in the extra effort
Consistently identify your deficiencies and work on them so that you can grow as an individual and create better value for other people
Sales really makes the world go around, even if you recommend or like something you are basically selling … There is so much material available today on the Art of Selling, some is out dated, and some is really on point, a lot of the ideas and content in this blog are from Anthony Iannarino…
Greg Gillies helps business owners scale their companies profitably. He is an expert at mapping out growth Strategies for companies and then building a sales and marketing machine that delivers against the Strategy, all while making things super simple to understand. If you’re interested in scaling your own business more profitably by automating your sales and marketing processes, then definitely reach out and request a free strategy session today.